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[realistics]

T E X T ✘ V O I C E ✘ V I D E O ✘ A C T I O N

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[ikols]

[ Goodbye, best friend. ]

When I killed the boy he was magically neutered, for want of a better phrase. He was young and innocent, it wasn't within his purview. I took over lacking the power I'd once wielded and wanted it returned to me more than anything else. I really mean that. So, I planned for a way to get it all back ...

[ Here he delves into the story of manipulating a multiversal parasite for his own gain, driving apart Teddy and Billy with fears of existential manipulation and suicidal alternatives to a desperately worsening situation as adults all over the world fell victim to Mother's influence. Hopping through dimensions in a bid to find Tommy, strung along by the Patri-not as events steadily took a nosedive.

His gaze drops mid-explanation, pausing as he finds a stopgap. ]

I constantly coerced and goaded Billy into learning useful spells, proving he could trust me, then I taught him how to invoke one that would make me older, to an age where I should have had my magical prowess. It didn't work and everything ... rapidly started to get far, far worse.

[realistics]

[She absolutely despises lies. Every catch of one leads to an aggravating frustration, entirely unwanting of having to know she isn't getting the honest truth. Except here, she wishes she could get even the tiniest detection, a hint that Loki was spouting lies to her. But there's nothing, and she wishes Eudio had somehow messed with her abilities, turning them off for this one moment.

I killed the boy.]

But I thought ... that wasn't real. [She knows Loki's had his secrets, but it's a heavier load than she expected and the more truth that spills from his lips, the more unsure she becomes of what she's even listening to.

He was right to tell her to sit, feeling her legs grow almost weak from the overwhelming storytelling. Even so, she stands, eyes scanning him as she tries to find the proper words.]

You said you wanted to change. You said you wanted to be better. I trusted that.

[So why?]

[ikols]

That's not all.

[ Holding out his hands as if to calm a wild animal, he pleads with her with his eyes if not his words, continuing on in the same frank, flat tone. ]

I wanted my magic back. I wanted it more than I can express, it was ... it was as if a limb was missing, I craved it desperately. I was selfish and relentless. When Billy's spell didn't work, everything began to unravel. We went into the final battle where it was revealed the constructs were built from my power. I'm a god, Verity. My story is a very real thing, I create roles as much as I live them, warping reality at times, and my guilt manifested into fully-developed personas. [ His hands upturn. ] I hadn't wanted to lead the others on but back then I didn't understand why, I wasn't made to be anything other than a murder weapon. As soon as I did, my magic returned. I sent Teddy to Billy and ... it all got a little Disney, after that. We won. I left.

When I applied to the All-Mother I demanded that I should be paid for my services, that's where we struck a deal that for every mission I carried out, a crime in my past would be erased. Expunged from the annals of history so I wouldn't have to be defined by his story anymore. I didn't want to be the thing I was becoming, the monster who destroyed a child's life! The King Loki I met in Asgardia's dungeon, the one my mother has sold me out to.

[ His expression weakens, brows cinching. ]

I do want to be better.

[realistics]

[It all becomes even harder to follow, the complexity of a god's story far beyond anything she's known from the relatively normal life she led before Loki. As everything continues to unravel, she has a breath held that she doesn't know how to let go, hating herself for not being able to register this all as a lie.]

You say you want to be better, but ... everything I hear from you is just ... [She shakes her head, ducking it down as she strays from his eyes.]

Why didn't you tell me? You can't use the "I didn't have the chance" line. Not again. This was before me and you didn't say anything. Did your old friends showing up suddenly put a damper on your plans to hide it?

[ikols]

What was I supposed to say? "You're the only person who believes I have any hope of changing what I've been for hundreds of years, and by the way, I murdered an innocent boy and tried to destroy the lives of all these other people, my mistake".

[ He takes a step forward, hands held out low in supplication as he ducks his head, trying to catch her evasive gaze. ]

None of them are from a point in our time-line where they knew I'd betrayed them. I've spent the past few days going from one to another, bringing them ... up to date.

[realistics]

I've been defending you.

[She does look up at him this time, but this time with her eyes widened and pained as if struggling to figure out where her trust in him lies now. Anger and frustration linger, but most of all, uncertainty — with both him and herself.]

With Valeria Richards talking about you bringing about the end of the world and me trying to convince her that she's wrong, that you can change. Telling Skye and all these people that you're different. But then there's me — clueless Verity who reads lies and doesn't realize she's known nothing.

[Running her hands through her hair, they trail to her face to rub her eyes, in fear that they'll water up somehow. But when they fall again, she steps closer, looking straight into green eyes without straying, wondering if staring long enough will unveil everything else hidden behind them.] I've put all my trust in you. And I don't do that, Loki. With anyone. But how many secrets do you keep from me? How many times have you confessed something to me only because something inconvenient's forced you to tell me?

[ikols]

[ His throat dries out, trying to look askance and always drawn back to the anger in stern brown eyes, whipped by words of stark disappointment. His shoulders sag under the weight of his shame. ]

I wanted to keep you in my life for as long as I could until you realised you had every reason to not want to stay.

[realistics]

Loki. Don't do that. Don't toss out excuses.

[She shakes her head, still struck with a continuous hurt, shared in their lasting glances. She doesn't stop moving in closer to him, even if she makes no contact, fingers stretching out at her sides.] All I want is for you to be honest with me. I told you — I'm here for you. But I can't do that if you keep hiding everything from me.

[ikols]

[ It's true, though. Looking her over, he tries to find a foothold. In the end, he trips over a once-silver tongue that now lays leaden. ]

I'm sorry, Verity. I never intended to hurt you.

[realistics]

[It is true, just as everything he does tell her. Just like this. Her chest aches even so with every word, but the anger in her eyes simmer down and past the frustration is still continuous concern for the only person she's ever been able to call her best friend.]

Then remember that it's not just you. This friendship isn't just Loki. It's you and me. I'm here too. Trust me the way I've tried to trust you. This relationship — this friendship doesn't work if you can't do that.

[ikols]

I will try.

[ His hands are offered as his eyes stay down, finding it the opportune time to get everything off his chest at once. The possibly relevant details, anyway. Tired as he is, after a weighty pause Loki sighs. ]

The boy had a best friend. He was so scared of the things I might do to her that he had her cast into the ancient past, far beyond my reach. Leah was one of the constructs I accidentally fortified. You see, even he knew I would be awful to anyone who trusted me.

[realistics]

[It takes a moment but when she takes his hands, she does so tightly, suddenly never wanting to let go again. Even now, he means so many things to her, even if the fright over the secrets keep her full of worry.]

You want to change. You want to be better. That wasn't a lie. But you need to prove that. You can't change what's happened, but you can still stop that future. I still — [Her fingers lace with his and she tilts her head to catch his eyes.] I still believe in you. I do.

[ikols]

[ His hands in hers are gentle as they squeeze, even by mortal standards. There's a horrid lump in his throat, one he wishes he could carve out. ]

Trust in me, even if you can't trust me at the time. Believe I will fix things in my own way, even if it seems I'm not. I can't be anything but Loki.

[realistics]

[She rubs at his knuckles with her fingertips, the gesture for her own sake just as much as his. She should be raged over this, kicking him out the door, but he told her. Late as he is, he stepped up on his own to reveal everything, the entire truth. And whether in this world or the last, she needed him just as much as he needed her.]

I know. You — you still have me. I'm not going anywhere. [If her hold is any indication.]

[ikols]

[ One of his hands slips free, threading through the back of her hair to draw Verity close. A soft peck is placed on her hair-line, and he chins her crown in relief. ]

Thank you. Thank you for staying, even if you hate me for this.

[realistics]

I don't hate you.

[She sighs, eyes closing with that kiss as she's reeled in closer with ease.] I just need you to be more honest with me. No more secrets, Loki. I can't — I won't be able to handle being in the dark again.

[ikols]

I can't tell you everything I've done or may do, or even might need to. Please don't hold me to Thor's standard.

[ Otherwise, she'll be so disappointed. ]

Trust me even when I'm not being entirely honest.

[realistics]

That's not what I'm doing. [He's not Thor, not even close, and she wouldn't want him to be.]

But I need to know you'll treat me more like your friend and not just as your convenience.

[ikols]

Verity, if you think anything about you proves convenient for me, we have a serious problem.

[ He has to laugh at that, chest shaking. ]

[realistics]

[His laugh has her smiling and she tilts forward, forehead resting on his shoulder as her own chuckles rise.]

Good, if I mean trouble for you, then we're even.

[ikols]

Let's see. Actual God of Lies, Mischief, and generally Shady Supervillain Dealings hanging out with a woman who can call him on every ounce of his own bullshit. Yes, that's very convenient for all my Scooby Doo dickering about.

[ His arms come up around her shoulders, giving a squeeze, and he keeps her within the circle of them a little longer. Just because he can (and she lets him). ]

[realistics]

I think someone's got a kink for being called on his own bullshit.

[When his arm find their way around her, she can't find a reason not to put her own around his waist, nails bundling up the back of his shirt as she gets comfortable in his hold.]

My tolerance must really be keeping you around then, because otherwise, I don't see why you do.

[ikols]

[ His snort of a soft laugh doesn't address the notion of a kink (!!), even if he gives a wriggle so she has to hold onto him that much more. ]

I keep you around because ... I believe I would be a very different person without you, and it scares me what that might mean.

[realistics]

[She doesn't see how she could have that much of a strong effect but her fingers press into his back from the words anyway.]

Then it's good you got stuck with me, I guess.

[ikols]

[ His nose nudges her temple. ]

Verity, why do you let yourself be stuck with me?